"Listening to someone else without challenging or correcting them does not mean you agree with them. It means you are willing to hear what they think, and seek understanding of their heart." Kathy Spampinato

"If possible, so far as it depends on you, live peaceably with all." Romans 12:18 This statement is challenging in a society where people who have a differing opinion are rejected and often ridiculed. Cancel Culture is defined as a "current phrase used to describe a culture in which those who are deemed to have acted or spoken in an unacceptable manner are ostracized, boycotted, or shunned." This is the world we live in, but God's Word tells us to live peaceably with all.

To make it personal, I need to realize that relational difficulty should never come because of me. I have to learn how to get along, to compromise, and accept other people. I need to be humble, and apologize when I've said the wrong thing, or been insensitive. I need to cultivate an atmosphere where others are given dignity, respect, and value even if I don't really understand them: even if they think or act differently than I do.

Listening to someone else without challenging or correcting them does not mean you agree with them. It means you are willing to hear what they think, and seek understanding of their heart. It offers them acceptance of who they are, and not necessarily agreement with what they believe or say. You are willing to listen to their story, and empathize with their experience. Let's explore this idea.

1 Peter 1: 22 ESV "Having purified your souls by your obedience to the truth for a sincere brotherly love, love one another earnestly from a pure heart, "

To me this verse indicates the person who has grown spiritually and is a sincere follower of Christ. They have purified their own heart and are walking in the truth. Their faith has changed their character and allowed a measure of the fruit of the Spirit. They are desiring to show love in earnest. This assumes they are not listening only to find a spot to correct the other person. They have not decided that they should teach the other person what the real truth is. They are not in the conversation only to have the opportunity to testify as to their own opinion. They are not listening only enough to prepare their response- like the rebuttal in a debate. Their desire to have the other person grow in their faith and receive God's grace, is not causing them to manipulate. They truly want to show love and respect.

I have found that the longer I have been a believer, the more convinced I am of my opinions regarding life and faith. I have allowed the love of God to change me, and am confident that I know the truth. I have grown in character and in the truth of the Word of God, and want others to have more freedom in Christ. Yet, I must maintain my humility and realize that I do not have all the answers. God does. If I am truly open to the voice of the Holy Spirit, I can listen to another person and accept them exactly where and how they are. I realize "there, but for the grace of God, go I." I am a sinner, saved by grace. I can then listen to the Holy Spirit for insight into how to really show a sincere love, from a pure heart, that wants to build up the other person -not correct them. I can be a support or even an advisor, but do not need to try and change anyone. I can leave that to the Holy Spirit. It is His job!

Today, I am thinking of situations where I have learned to walk with confidence: in areas where I have a level of authority. For you, it could be the authority you have in your job, as a parent, or an area where you have a leadership role. It is important to speak with authority and be direct at times, but also be loving and aware of how we come across to others. As a parent or manager, we might have to correct others at times, but if we ask for Holy Spirit's guidance, we can do it with wisdom and still show respect and appreciation at the same time. We are building others up to be more confident in who they are.

Ephesians 4:15 says, "Rather, speaking the truth in love, we are to grow up in every way into him who is the head, into Christ, from whom the whole body joined and held together by every joint with which it is equipped, when each part is working properly, makes the body grow so that it builds itself up in love."